Boxes - Contemplation in 3 Parts
Posted by Rob Kistner | Filed under Free Verse, Image, Poetry, Tanka, art, courage, dark, horror, humor, love, mystery, photo, rhyme, stream of consciousness, tragedy, whimsy, wisdom
•
like crows in fallow fields
they pick clean
the bones of my recall
bones against the cruel clay
of an arid barren mind
bones spilled from soul boxes
in which I’d desperately collected
the scarred and damaged pieces
of my broken dreams
dreams now parched and withered
dried brittle in the coarse winds
of my dire confusion
their promises scratched and raspy
slowly slipping unintelligible
into the chaos and cacophony
of the crows in fallow fields
• • •
a box within more boxes
so deeply buried
by the years of failed dreams
you must not lose your wonder
• • •
a box locked inside your heart
lost in the rubble
of years of broken promise
you can find it if you look
• • •
May 12th, 2010 at 4:49 am
I could visualize the nested boxes—each holding a dream.
May 12th, 2010 at 5:27 am
Hey Rob,
My favourite is #1, it is a very sound-reliant poem, which prompted me to read it aloud a few times. I like your concept of “soul boxes,” rather than a physical box.
-Mallery
May 12th, 2010 at 6:19 am
Rob, these are wonderful. I love all three. The visual images were great and your words speak of so much. Well done.
Melanie
May 12th, 2010 at 8:38 am
Rob,
Loved all three of these.
I love this bit.
“the scarred and damaged pieces
of my broken dreams”
Pamela
May 12th, 2010 at 9:16 am
Yes Mallory, very astute on your part. Being a vocalist, and enjoying a deep resonant voice — a great deal of what I write is written with the idea of it being spoken aloud. I find poetry to be at its best when carried by the voice.
I wrote Contemplation #1 to be very orally visceral, to be physical in the mouth, on the lips, the tongue - reading it aloud adds an intended dimension to the poem, you get to see how it feels in the mouth.
May 12th, 2010 at 9:18 am
Thank you Pamela, very much… the line you chose had much meaning for me, summing up heavy parts of my life experience…
May 12th, 2010 at 9:19 am
Thank you Melanie, your comments are moist gracious and appreciated…
May 12th, 2010 at 9:22 am
Linda - I often envision our dreams, not as things that necessarily die then pass into non-existence — but rather, as things we put away, for whatever the reason… they will forever be our dreams, even if we no longer hold them in our hands… Thank you for your kind words…
May 12th, 2010 at 9:44 am
A very thought-provoking trio of verse. Well done!
May 12th, 2010 at 10:24 am
Hope is a potent thing even when seemingly lost, or tucked away. I like the three “pieces” here. Thanks Rob.
May 12th, 2010 at 10:33 am
You’re welcome Neil, thank you for your kind words…
May 12th, 2010 at 10:35 am
Thank you Zouxzoux - this was a related but fragmented tapestry of thought here that felt best at three pieces - a free verse poem and two tankas…
May 12th, 2010 at 4:40 pm
I like the first piece with the crows in fallow fields. You are a prolific poet, Rob.
May 12th, 2010 at 4:58 pm
I am pleased you liked the first piece Irene, it was the focus of the 3-part contemplation… thank you for commenting…
My writing muse had been severely hobbled for most of last year, owing to medications I had been persuaded that I needed. I have tossed them all, and my muse is again alive. If I am a bit manic — so be it… I love to write, and thank you for reading…
May 13th, 2010 at 9:12 am
Very fine poem. My favorite section is the first. Love the crow and bone imagery for the actions of the mind dealing with past reality.
May 13th, 2010 at 1:01 pm
I like how you wrought these three poems…I have to say that the first is my favorite, with all of the bone and crow imagery with which you weave the mood of the piece. The second and the third are like little gems that sparkle. Nicely done.
-Nicole
May 13th, 2010 at 9:01 pm
well contemplated Rob and an excellent write. and the broken dreams….I can relate to….but actually the dreams are not really broken….maybe just a wee b ig bent….but still there…and hopefully always be there.
…..across the Cascades..over the Purcells and up to the Rockies to our front deck….we will be waiting Rob….what a hoot that would be….there are quite a few Yankee draft dogers up here and friends and neighbors of ours….
…..so your a hoops fan too?…I follow Gonzaga lots…there was a rumor around Spôkane that Mark Few …Zags coach…mite head back home and coach the Ducks….I think he turned down the offer as he and familly really love Spôkane….anyways….cheers and thanks for poems
May 13th, 2010 at 9:35 pm
Thank you Paul. As I commented to Irene, the first part was the recipient of my primary energy, but I also fully embraced the two Tankas…
May 13th, 2010 at 9:37 pm
Nicole -
I am glad you saw the sparkle among the bones… very kind words, thank you…
May 13th, 2010 at 9:51 pm
Wayne -
You are most gracious, thank you… Kathy and I have friends in Canada, and we haven’t been in forever. We have discussed, more than once, a round-trip driving tour from Vancouver to Lake Louise/Banff — who knows… I was hoping Mark would come to UofO, but we will have to settle with Dana Altman, though he seems to be a proven winner — who knows?
…rob
May 15th, 2010 at 8:57 am
Rob, stunning work. All three have images that penetrate. And you’re right - you CAN find it if you look. This is firsthand knowledge speaking…
Thanks for your work on the site as well. A new avenue for me, and your prompts are open and evocative.
Peace, Amy
May 16th, 2010 at 9:32 pm
I liked all three of your takes on boxes. I especially enjoyed the “their promises scratched and raspy” line in your first contemplation.
May 16th, 2010 at 10:21 pm
Thank you Walker, you are most gracious…
…rob