blackthorn rosebud, secret passion
mystery dreamed, fantasy craved
earthen lustwitch, molten ardor
scarlet scorching, sultry vision
forged in bronze fired, writhing midnight
wanton temptress, my dream desired
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: dVerse
I was inspired to write this by one of my favorite of Robert Fripp’s King Crimson “Pojekts”. I then decided to extract sections from 3 different poems I have written over the past years, beginning with my poem “Awe” from 2007. I then edited and revised these borrowed sections, melding them together with wholly new poetic bridges. This is my vision of where the world may be heading, if we don’t pull our heads out into the light — and pretty damned wuickly.
N.B. — Be warned, this is a dark vision, full of reflections on how beautiful this earth is — and lamenting how it should always have remained such.
Vividly
I remember
I remember when it happened
remember well
the all-defining fire mark in time
that forever divided then
from now
the moment of the horrific pronouncement
when all the world’s atmospheric agencies
and all the world’s environmental agencies
and the world governments
unequivocally agreed
…the earth has passed the tipping point
soon this planet
will no longer support human life
no more monies will be spent
in this undeniably failing effort
to keep earth habitable
for our human species
now all funds will go
towards a massive plan to escape
in order that our species might survive…
fuuuck! we are such stupid assholes!
we finally did it!
you know — with our human track record
no plan is going to help us survive — ourselves
feels like a damned expensive, fruitless waste
couldn’t shake those angry thoughts back then
when first I heard the disheartening news
truth be told
I was very angry — but not totally shocked
and I am still not certain we understand
what it will take to ever survive
perhaps our journey from the atomic age
through the nuclear age
into our current digital age
has sent our human species
irretrievably off the rails
but nothing I can do about it
I now just spend my time alone
walking up along this forested valley
that is our southern property line
my eyes drifting up the crystal waters
of the clear mountain stream
that rolls towards me
crisp and pure
I then cast my eyes upwards
to the very tops
of the powerful Douglas Firs
and the elegant Western Cedar
as I pass slowly by
they stand proud
at the river’s edge
sentries for centuries
protecting this boundary of our lands
steady and enduring
yet always supple in the winds
that waft and quicken
whispering the breath of life
into this pristine realm
as I walk
my tears glisten
we are such damned fools
we have finally done it
two years on now
since that ominous
worldwide news conference
but I never can forget
the chill in my bones
that penetrating feeling
in those mind-numbing moments
when I realized
it’s over
global panic has since ensued
cities worldwide are collapsing
humans gone insane
ugliness I do not wish to witness
so I remain isolated
isolated with my memories
random memories
like the beauty of an opening rose
or the wonder of an unfurling frond
or the tart-sweet scent
of mighty conifer giants
thrusting ever skyward
or the magic
of a budding branch
of how my spirit
is soothed by wind and water
thrilled by the song of birds
or the swoop of hawks
of how my fascination
is stirred by the yelp
or bark
or bleat
of beasts
or how my soul stirs
at seeing a salmon’s trek
here in this stream
or gazing into the open sky
watching the roll of unobstructed clouds
thrilling at the fall of stars
or hearing the crack of thunder
resound for miles across our valley
then off the mountain’s face
or how I love the embrace of rain
the crisp and quiet drift of snow
the hues and sway of living fields
or love watching our orchard
blossom and bloom to fruit
gazing upon these forests
thick beyond horizons
or feeling the lift of cresting surf
now I amble alone
alone with my precious memories
of these natural wonders
that inspire
that lift my soul
that resonate my heart
that could have continued
should have continued
still
but…
damnit to hell…
this was an eden
but we proved a stubborn
stupid species
we would not listen
and now
now paradise is dying
at our careless hands
and now I am alone
too long alond
too long since I have shared
this beautiful mountain stream
with another’s eyes
or found my voice
to exclaim its wonders
yet still
I ramble this valley
wade this stream
given to jabbering quietly
to no one in particular
at the ragged edge of coherence
hoping for a response
a response assuring me
that this is just a nightmare
but only comes the murmur
of this constant stream
I have held my mind
in good humor
but not all have
reports of continuing suicides
murders
robberies
kidnap
rapes
humans unhinged
but I remain
tethered to the waning hope
that this can’t possibly
all be coming to an end
a hope
buoyed by the majesty of these forests
that climb their way skyward
with the patience
with the persistence
of the ages
but each day
the horrifying realization
muddles my mind
suffocates my soul
we {{{ have }}} destroyed it all
the world burns more and more
year after year
with more intensity each year
we need a miracle
but sadly
there is a scarcity of miracles
tonight
I will again
sit alone
in my room
in the soft light of the fire
I’ll cry
and wonder — why
we had all the warnings
more than enough
and we had the time
but we were
so
fucking
arrogant
perhaps
this beautiful
magical world
this amazing paradise
would have been much
much better off
without us
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry Inspired by Ecological Change: Earthweal
Gone are the days when clouds were either bright or dark. Bright meant good weather, dark meant inclement weather. Now they’re piss yellow, soot black, flame orange, and shades of steel blue sorrow. But these clouds are clearly foreign, such an exotic clutter, against the blue cloth of the sky. They signify disaster.
These bizarre colored clouds are rising much more often over western North America, as thousands upon thousands of forested acres are consumed by fire — at an alarming increase every year. More and more homes and human lives, are now impacted.
This devastating aberration of nature’s necessary, constructive wildfires, is the result of careless, human-driven global climate change — as are ever increasing unnatural disasters around planet earth. We humans are certainly doing our ignorant, irrespondible best to accelerate the current Holocene extinction — and make certain our species is included. Look it up!
Poetry at: dVerse
What have I done dog
fool am I
what have I done
I have let our love song die
when the fire of love
flickers dims and dies
and a shadow falls
deep in darkened eyes
hollow words of love
become but empty lies
and dog, like a fool, I have lied
I watch as our love song died
that open door
of her tender heart
has swung quietly closed
round the fragile part
she has locked me out dog
turned her back
what once was sweet and effortless
can never again feel right
and the fall began so near unseen
as though but the passing of night
my heart is broken dog
my worthless heart
I remember this morning
no dawn broke
not tenderness nor warmth awoke
a loneliness encircled slow
I sought the one that I love so
but no — dog no
she has turned away
she is fed up dog
no longer does she hear my love song
at night she’s still
within arm’s reach
but I sense the void
I feel the breach
these nights
she still shares my bed
I roll and turn
then lift my head
I search her face
in the predawn glow
whose eyes those are
I no longer know
she sees me blankly dog
her stare is hollow
I feel such tears
I need to fight dog
can’t run away
I gotta stay
love’s slowly dying
night after night
I know we will never again
be right
like a piercing painful clarity
I feel it dog
I know
I know
last night she slept so quietly
but I fear her heart left long ago
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: The Sunday Muse
https://youtu.be/tYIYIVG64C4
This is me in 1961. Lead singer of surf music band, the Triptides.
This is me in 1964. Lead singer of the R&B group, Brothers Royal.
This is me in 1967. Lead singer of hard rock group, Stone Fox.
Me in 1974, as punk persona Myles R. Gyles, doing insane rock&roll.
Me (standing) in 1980. Lead singer of jazz/rock band Qruze Quintet.
When life has lost its harmony
a simple song is where to start
sing — and laughter will light your day
a joyful chorus will lift your heart
if strife makes you feel you’re lost
a sweet melody will find your way
a joyful chorus will lift your heart
sing — and laughter will light your day
if you find your mind is full of worry
a tune will make the dark clouds part
sing — and laughter will light your day
a joyful chorus will lift your heart.
a cheerful whistle if you feel low
sadness flees when you sing and play
a joyful chorus will lift your heart
sing — and laughter will light your day
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: dVerse
Here’s to the amazing man who has made the whole world sing for nearly 60 years:
…this is a poem about the horror and ethical dilemma that is war, and the devastating impact it can have on the minds and hearts of soldiers sent into battle…
my eyes take refuge
in this late evening dew
scented with munitions
settling like a shroud
wet
opaque
obscuring
I am sustained
by this damp cool pall
that descends upon me
wraps ‘round me
‘round my pain
my struggling countenance
fevered with fatigue
deafened by weapon’s roar
crippled with despair
driven
by faint memory of honor
of duty
of human dignity
I stumble
broken by this sin I shoulder
this perversion
not of my making
but of my charge
now my sin
conceived and unleashed
by soulless others
who would impose their brutish will
their twisted vision
their malignant agenda
of domination
those who would take it all
wear the conqueror’s crown
who would rule the world
a world now broken
corrupted by their distorted vision
spoiled by their vanity
a world in chaos
I have but this bloodied
ruin-riddled road
of descending twilight
mortal urgency
of dying dreams
crushed innocence
destruction
death
decay
this road
of my duplicity
of my guilt
my shame
and so I stumble on
mindlessly muttering
mea culpa
mea culpa
parce mihi deus
saturated
with this falling evening
with this drenching sorrow
exhausted
vaguely alert
nerves shattered as eggshells
numb to panic
hollow
empty
I stumble
into this coming night
I stumble
and the next night
and the night that follows
that always follows
captive on this road of murder
of mounting evil
of horrific violence
of brutal human arrogance
I stumble
prisoner
of this foresaken journey
so lost
seeking forgiveness
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry Pantry at: Poets & Storytellers
These photos and poem, are of our former Oregon home grounds in the Cascade Mountain foothills. That is my wife Kathy standing under, and peering up into our 2 giant banana palms. This was our little eden for 25 years, from 1990.“
it is the large window
overlooking the amazing garden
that my wife Kathy meticulously created
through this window
remembered so vividly this day
I see the scurry of creatures
warmed by the Oregon summer
I hear nature
in splendid voice
the chuff
of a tree’d red squirrel
the song
chirp
and trill of birds
chickadee
goldfinch
western bluebird
a striking red-headed
yellow-winged
western tanager
and others
fly
flutter
and flit
in a flash of orange
a striking northern flicker
momentarily eschewing insects
is peck peck pecking
cracking black-oil sunflower seeds
that spill from our feeder
a red-tailed hawk
calls
kee-eeeee-arr
kee-eeeee-arr
from atop a Sitka spruce
swaying
in the crisp blue sky
the muffled belling of a deer
wandering the safety of old-growth
whispers
through the foothills
the distant bark
of a neighbor’s dog
echoing the basin
up along our stream
joined by scattered laughter
reminds me
we have friends nearby
good friends
my wife’s
gentle laughter
acknowledges the friendship
her tender smile
validates our love
the rustle of leaves
stirred by the breeze
wafting through the valley
smartly punctuated
by the staccato
of conifer cones
that fall
from time to time
wrested free by chickaree
and chipmunk
chattering high in Douglas fir
busy with their forage
I clearly recall the
wap wap wap
they bounce off our roof
striking the ground
closely followed
by the scamper
of their liberators
crunching their way
to the heart-meat of the cone
the delicacy
that elicits this furious industry
drifting in the window
intoxicating fragrances
cedar
pine
fir
lily
rose
lilac
grasses
loam
and more
a rich
earthy bouquet
I breathe in
deeply
a heady smile
lost in my reverie
remembering
sweetly remembering
a place lost in time
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: dVerse
Suddenly
a beautiful doe
bounds onto the forest trail
standing proud
golden in sunlight
drifting down dreamlike
she considers me briefly
then disappears
quick as a stolen glance
quiet as hushed breath
leaving only breezes
whispering the old growth canopy
and my quickening heartbeat
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: dVerse
This day
you are free
free to fly
to rise and glide
in buoyed flight
to soar skyward
in sweeping circles
so fly
fly high
on mighty thermals
high above this constant rain
you are no longer earthbound
not a prisoner
of my cold steel cage
nor of my constant sorrow
no longer captive
this day
this day will be soaring
and swooping
and diving
free
giving thanks for your feathers
and hollow bones
I have neither
and I cannot escape
so bird — fly for us both
my heart will soar with you
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: The Sunday Muse
This ability to instantaneously dismiss, is a dangerous subconscious dehumanization, and in that, a subtle devaluation of each other, as flesh and blood. We have become more or less electronic entities we can have appear and disappear at whim and will. The onslaught of things to attract us and distract us, driven by internet, cable, and dish, via “24/7 streaming” of significant elements of our reality(s), create fewer and fewer “whole” things in which we are substantively grounded. This makes much of our daily “life” ethereal, temporary, avoidable, deletable, and superficial.
We are bombarded daily by unfounded supposition, opinions, dogmas, and blatant scripted lies; as well as immersive presentations of fantasy realities via movies, TV, grandiose advertisement, and video games. This occurs to such a degree that reality has become fluid — perceived truth has become relative. All of this leads further to dehumanization and devaluation of “real” human life.
We face an incredibly volatile situation, perfect for abandonment of a sense of responsibility for the real world, our earth in which we physically live — hence the acceleration of ecological disasters and burgeoning environmental collapse we are now witnessing. It also makes it much easier, through misinformation and subterfuge, for evil, exploitive agendas to take root. Agendas that can develop into very serious real world social exploitation — hence, the growing Trump nightmare, and its related trappings, as well as the other demagogs and dogmas that have begun sprouting forth in society. But wait, where are we now? These are tense, dangerous, and potentially explosive times in which we live. Ours has become an ever more fragile world.
when we begin to believe
we have risen to favor
and privilege
above the humble
bloody afterbirth
of our origin
when in our reflection
we see perverse transcendence
towards entitlement
in which no allegiance
or kinship to nature
binds us to our center
when our insanity
of magnified human arrogance
so distorts our vision
of the sacred ancient balance
so twists our vision
of our place in
or our inherent responsibility
to protect
the bone-broken reality
of the natural order
when we blatantly begin
to eat our own
while copulating
with false gods
on forsaken gilded altars
of rampant greed
and planetary neglect
celebrating utter disregard
for the sanctity of life
all life
then the hour of extinction
is certainly at hand
and we’ve all become
the hulking mass
of the apocalypse
deserving to be struck down
by the self-inflicted rapier
of raw wild justice
yes we do
yes we definitely do
but wait
before that
I want to be a rocketman
I want to explore the universe
soar off into outer space
way up with the stars and planets
far from this slowly dying place
until then — let’s take a leisure drive
stick our heads out of the windows
wow – those beautiful butterflies
think they know which way the wind blows
we are rollin’ rollin’ rollin’
not certain where we’re goin’
I lost my pearly guitar pic
it’s been missin’ now for hours
I found my favorite baseball mitt
in a field full of wild flowers
but wait, acres of virgin rain forest
more than 200,000 everyday
what d’fuck is it we’re thinkin’
cutting those vital trees away
we keep rollin’ rollin’ rollin’
no idea where we’re goin’
let’s put on a sunny face
let’s not appear that we are dour
let us just laugh off our guilt
while we boogie down for hours
but wait, 630,000 machine guns
are privately owned in the USA
that is a lotta gaw-damned firepower
on the loose here everyday
always rollin’ rollin’ rollin’
where the fuck we think we’re goin’
maybe just to clear my head
I’ll go ’n climb that water tower
wow — I can see a lot from here
like those school kids by the flowers
but wait, 229 school shootings
337 victims have sadly died
when you send your children off to schoolg
no guarantee they’ll come back alive
the horror’s rollin’ rollin’ rollin’
the solution is not known
hey — where’s that sunny funny face
maybe if we all join in a song
perhaps sing a song of make-believe
we can smile as we sing along
but wait, our planet’s becoming a garbage dump
ton n’a half of trash gets tossed away
by every man woman and child
each year in the US of A
we’re ‘bout to blow it blow it blow it
nearly no place left to throw it
oh sure — the world has begun to flood
the part that’s not — is burning
but hell — there ain’t no climate change
just ignore all that we’re learning
let’s just pretend that all is well
these g’damned masks are irritating
these stupid lockdowns are real hell
but wait, global plague just keeps mutating
the bug is changin’ changin’ changin’
daily life keeps rearrangin’
let’s forget these world problems
most are probably spread by hacks
let’s drive through for some fast food
I’ll have a coupala’ Big Macs
but wait 14 million children
under the tender age of five
starve each day here on this planet
fighting hard to stay alive
but we keep glut’n glut’n glut’n
and we ain’t sharin’ nutt’n
man — this is hard to take
like everybody’s gone insane
sometimes I’d like to fly away
just escape all of this pain
oh shit — my hair is all messed up
guess it’s time to go back home
but time has proven to be relative
many friends and relatives are gone
people dyin’ dyin’ dyin’
those left behind just can’t stop cryin’
close that open window please
my apathy’s blowin’ away
interplanetary travel has begun
perhaps I will launch someday
maybe out there I can just forget
how truly badly we fucked up
even though we had the warning signs
we refused to drink the bitter cup
we pretended it was gonna be alright
that surely others would handle it
but wait — we “were” the fuckin’ others
and we never cleaned up our shit
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: dVerse
Poetry Pantry at: Poets & Storytellers
T he lover’s join for Hades’ night
at the dying of season’s light
as this spent year wanes
Ceres searches in vane
will life’s cycles reprise
a fertile new year again arise
will the power of the light’s rebirth
bring Persephone’s bounty again to earth
…STAY TUNED…
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: dVerse
…my memories from years ago, living in the Ohio River Valley…
F inding it best to breathe more slowly in this August heat, I inhale haltingly. I can almost feel my nostrils singed by scalded air, nearly too hot and thick to breathe. The heat is suffocating. In my need for oxygen, I cautiously fill my lunges, baking them with each sustaining breath. This broiling oven is difficult to endure.
My skin weeps, ablaze in this inferno. I feel salted droplets baste my neck, trace their way irritatingly down my spine, to puddle in the small of my back, saturating the waistband of my running shorts. They collect in the hollow of my chest, hesitant in its fire breathing. Infuriatingly, they soak my shirt.
Annoying beads of sweat, bloom and seep, from beneath the smother of hair, now just a matted soak atop my head. They ooze their way, down the fevered slope of my forehead, into my eyes — and sting! Endeavoring to transform my beard into a salty bog, they cling bitter in my mustache, impossible not to taste.
Be damned you glaring sphere! You crackle in this steaming sky, bearing down rude and relentless, heartlessly imposing, sapping my energy. Nothing will be accomplished this day, my motivation is expired. Exhaustion permeates this humid midday. My thoughts feel sticky, my synapses overheated. Can I last until the quenching Autumn rain? Questions evaporate in this blistering August heat, desires vaporize, even dreams are scorched!
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: dVerse
…this is 100% certifiable fiction…
my wife’s stopped vining
gardening’s got her heart too
brought her down to earth
she’s learned to leaf me alone
her tied up with tending ours
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: The Sunday Muse
Poetry Pantry at: Poets & Storytellers
Poetry Inspired by Ecological Change: Earthweal
…inch by inch, row by row, John sings he’s gonna “grow his own”…
…John’s wife now helps tend their inch by inch, row by row…
all alone with her fractured dreams
tears glistening in the sun’s beams
she’s been pushed beyond her extremes
no more she screams — no more she screams
so silently she swims away
on this beautiful summer day
she’s got nothing much left to say
she just can’t stay — she just can’t stay
she has cried and cried and denied
the horrible lies they implied
distraught — she slipped under the tide
said no goodbye – fragile she died
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: dVerse
Suicide hotline: 800-273-8255
Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741-741
Someone loves you.
Seek till you find them, then tell them you love them!
April 14th 2017, at 2:00 AM, while in Evergreen Hospital, Kirkland WA, recovering from heart surgery — my heart stopped beating. I was saved by the efforts of their Code Blue team. That morning, a pacemaker was implanted in my heart. I began this poem not long after that, and finally finished it for this prompt.
fortunately — right place right time
in the hospital following surgery
fate’s given me another chance
guess I had better get it right
I’ve borrowed bought and sold
lived in lotsa’ shades of grey
I damn near leveraged my soul
just to play this fleeting game
I have not always been so kind
played a little fast and loose
spent so much time chasing fortune
too much time pursuing fame
I pray I’ll not end up an old man
gazing lonely out my window
trying hard just to remember
exactly how long it has rained
not sitting silent by the fire
deeply mired in consternation
wondering if all that I have lost
was worth what it was I gained
what I gained is more than gold
probably more than I deserve
I have been given a precious gift
the love of a daughter and two sons
the miracle of a gorgeous grandson
the warmth of a loving family
I have so many lives to cherish
my heart beats strong for every one
*
rob kistner © 2021
~< My deepest gratitude to the Code Blue team at Evergreen! >~
Poetry at: Poets & Storytellers