ripples on a dark lake
rise and roll away
into the sunset
toward that forever night
they carry my heavy heart
on their crest
and catch the tears
sorrowful tears
I cry at times
run aground
since you went away
times like now
would that I had a boat
a special boat
to ferry me
across this ocean of time
over that horizon of death
ferry me this day
to you
to see your face
just one more time
to hear your beautiful voice
rise in sweet song
would that I could hold you
this day
and tell you son
tell you the 10,000 things
I said far too seldom
when you were still here
in my life
*
U nmoored shipwrecked soul
thunderstruck — weathered with grief
broken on the rocks
*
rob kistner © 2021
Poetry at: The Sunday Muse
Grief comes in waves I have heard and come to know. This is a beautiful tribute to your wonderful son and the love you will forever have for him. May the cherished memories carry you through Rob. Thank you for sharing this with us. ????
The waves of sadness are balanced these days with waves of sweet memories. But there is always this current of wanting, wanting it to not be real, wanting to see Aaron again — wanting. Thank you for your kind words Carrie. 🙂
A beautifully written sad poem of loss . It is hard to accept the profound reality of the death of one’s child… the grief rolls in like waves . Writing poetry may help in a small way….Sincere condolences.
It was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. Took me a couple years to just get a grasp on acceptance.
Aah! This one cuts through the heart. Your poem touches a chord somewhere, Rob.
Thank you Sunita! 🙂
there is always a longing in eternal absence – longing to hold what has become so intangible but the death of a child is incomprehensible and adds the weight of consternation to your loss. So sorry Rob
Thank you Laura! Mostly sweet memories, but occasionally the horror of that day rears its ugly head. We beat it down with tears of thankfulness. The beauty of having had Aaron in my life is a most unique miracle that I will forever embrace.
So sorry for your loss, Rob.
Thank you Shay. Miss him everyday! Honor him on this date of his passing, expressing how much he was loved. No parent should outlive their child. Sadly it happens.
Emotion laid bare in your heartfelt words…
I loved him fiercely, as did his entire family, and his many friends.
Rob, this is a stunning and moving poem.
Thank you Chrissa. Remembering sweetly my beloved son Aaron.
I cannot fathom the depth of your sadness …. how beautiful your tribute to Aaron.
The memories of Aaron are mostly warm and sweet Helen! Only occasionally a tear, brought on by lasting love, in unexpected moments of wanting the see his face, hear his voice — but they usually resolve to warmth.
“to ferry me / across this ocean of time / over that horizon of death” – That is so powerful.
Thank you JR! I have so many warm memories of Aaron. I just now hung up the phone with my daughter Jennifer, Aaron’s older sister. We talked for an hour just reminiscing about all the lasting endearing memories we have of him. He was quite dynamic for his age of 18. Helluva athlete, great singer, one of the kindest young persons I have ever known. I live with his younger brother Justin, the father of my grandson Alex, so Jus and I talk about Aaron all the time. He is very much alive in our family. I just at times would like to see his face, hear him speak — once again face to face. I miss his physical presence.
Rob, I’m so glad you have your other kids to talk with and share memories of Aaron with. I think it is probably a mix of emotions but it helps to soothe as much as possible. {{{{HUGS}}}}
Thank you Lisa! It is wonderful having his brother snd sister in my life. They are incredible people, and such a joy. I also have my grandson, Alex Aaron Kistner, upon whom I can shower love… 🙂
That is still hard, Rob. These memories do not go away.
Mrs. Jim lost a brother (early) and a sister (this year from the COVID).
..
Loved ones lost, if they are truly imprinted on our souls, truly loved, truly precious, never are gone, not really — they are just gone on a road trip… but they are alive out there.
ah, Rob. as the father to a lost child, I offer you salute from this side of the door, that only the parents of such children know. Glad you have good memories of Aaron. ~ M
Thank you Grapelinh. It’s an exclusive club — nobody cares to join!!
So sorry for this tragedy. Your haiku at the end is perfect.
This is a remembrance of my love Sara, amplified by the sorrow of losing one so important, one so loved! That leads to sadness which gets re-elevated to memories of the love, powerful and everlasting.